The Moans From Bundles Of Filth In The Streets

This morning I woke up next to a bottle of 151 and a pile stacked high with vomit, whereas Jesse woke up next to a Polaroid photograph of his out-of-state girlfriend. Same/same, I suppose. (ha ha.) The only serious relationship I can seem to establish is the one between my lips and a Styrofoam cup filled to the brim with a kaleidoscope of different alcoholic beverages. I didn’t go to work because I have the day off. Going to the zoo at noon tomorrow, going to throw a noose into the gorilla cage and see if they know how to use it yet. By the way Jesse, tell Cameron I’m not gonna clean up that puke. That’s Cameron’s room, he can clean it up if he wants to. -ian with an i